Not knowing is half the battle

Personal perseverance and abstinence has been prominent in my life for quite a long while. I tend to get jaded easily, therefore I have hereby been avoiding hurling myself into alien social gatherings and sticking with a steadfast group of familiar friends. My personal avoidance has inevitably lead to an increased sense of longing that I have convinced myself may be fulfilled by a particular man. One man I have been acquainted is also acquainted with my "steadfast group," which might make him part of it, but the logistics of social networking can be somewhat murky.
My social tendencies are besides the point in regards to this futile attempt at explaining my feelings (as I hide them in lengthy sentences and unrelieved prose). It may be that the holidays have brought out my romanticism, or my will has finally caved in, but as of now my feelings seem quite genuine. All because he has been the first person I have met in a long while that isn't (so far) what I have expected him to be. I believe that deserves some merit, even if it is just a crude game.


For now,
A