Last night I went out to a dance night called Crush, which I used to attend ritually and regularly; dancing with people that I just met and trying to make conversation in a loud and smoke filled venue. The ritual has been overdone and overplayed and the people there are even more so. Of course, I try and attempt to feel like I should be there as I make the most awkward movements on the dance floor and try and slink away for a few seconds to possibly find someone to talk to. The petty drama lingering in the girls bathroom is always a humorous and genuine way to escape the pounding repetition of the monotonous music. But the fact that all the toilets are broken and about to start overflowing is discouraging and disgusting. I may have caught herpes or the swine flu just standing in there. Even after a few drinks when my words spill out like cold water from the outside hose I still feel awkward. Then I even got caught up in a conversation with an ex-lover, as my curiosity got the best of me I spewed out awkward and invasive questions that I truly have no right to know. But that was probably the highlight of "Crush" to be quite honest. Besides the people that I went with, since we were "goonin" (all wearing the same color, meaning we were trying to start mischief) and we had each other's back.
On the Walk back to the car as per usual we were stopped by a man trying to get money, bullshitting his way into it not even realizing that about every single person in this whole city has heard the "my wife is in the hospital" sob story. Then a angry drunk started getting upset because nobody wanted to talk to him, while I subtly instigate him in hopes of some excitement or at least a good anecdote.
As If anybody really is interested in all of this anyway. This song is good, because when I listened to it for the first time it struck me in a way that is very personal. I enjoy listening to music that helps you come to realizations and philosophies about yourself and your own life. Enjoy.
but i am still alive and loving wide eyed in my time not a mummy shrinking in its cloths your cat clawed out my eyes while i's distracted by your smile and now my sockets sit like empty catcher's mitts waiting and you ask me if there's anybody else that i'm dating.
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